Resources & Tips
Questions
Frequently Asked by Parents
Would
any of these apply to YOU??
How do I stop my child from demanding everything they see?
How many times have you offered your kids rewards for simple things like eating their vegetables or cleaning their room? This kind of bribery communicates loud and clear, "OK, I give up. I don’t believe I can make you do what's right. So, what's it worth to you?"
Bribery may get immediate results, but it can backfire in the long run, especially if you allow this kind of deal making to become a pattern. If kids learn that there's a trade-off (is pay-off better?) for good behavior, they will do the right thing only because they expect a reward, not because they WANT to do the right thing or because they respect your authority.
Instead of a bribe, give a direction. For example, instead of bribing with:
"If you dry the dishes, I'll give you money to buy a comic."
Instead, give clear directions:
"The dishes need drying. I need your help." or “Those dishes are looking for a capable dish-drier and you’re it!”
You can still offer rewards for good behavior, but be aware of how you state the reward. Instead of: "If you brush your teeth, I'll read you a story." try saying "After you brush your teeth, it will be time for a story." A small change in language will take bribery out of your parenting style and help you be more authoritative.
Nancy's book, "LOVING WITHOUT SPOILING." has 99 other tips for avoiding power struggles using positive discipline and much more.
| More Solutions to Parents' FAQs can be found in Nancy's books and articles found below.
•How
to Know if your Child is Spoiled |
 •
Sibling RivalryLearn nine solutions for handling sibling rivalry. • Have Your Kids Take the Sibling Survey This unique questionnaire for parents to give their children will help parents better understand sibling and family relationships and offer clues to how kids really feel about their brothers and sisters. |
•Avoid
Spanking |
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